Why Am I Socially And Romantically Desolate?


sagittarius vintage girlHi, Elsa

I am having trouble in love and with friendships. I am super friendly but struggle to recognize if the other is actually a friend or an acquaintance. Then I often get awkward and don’t really know how to act if they are the latter and wish I hadn’t given so much of myself away initially.

I have been dating a Gemini. I am devastated but think I must walk away because he limits our time together and can not be there like I want him to. He is friend-zoning me but misses my touch and likes feeling loved… every time we try to hang as friends we just sleep together.  I have so much affection for him and we get on so well I want him in my life. I often feel isolated and don’t feel like I can trust anyone.

I live in a big city and wonder if moving out to a more natural part of the world could help me feel more at peace and less wrapped up in my seemingly inept social skills.

Unclear in Australia

Hi, Unclear.

First, don’t give up hope!  You’ve presented a number of issues. Each of them are resolvable.  You just need a map.

First, you do have a tendency to sacrifice yourself.   It’s up to you to find a healthy way of expressing this side of yourself. Clearly, being a doormat for one man in particular doesn’t satisfy!

Secondly, you’re very smart and potentially effective. It’s up to you to choose wisely.  You know you need to ditch this man who will use you for sex as long as you allow it.  You don’t have a common goal, so you’re not going to get anywhere with him. Use your Mars in Aries. Cut the tie so you can fish another line.

Once you’re clear, resolve to be more discerning. You have the raw info. You know you are jumping into things to quickly, so SLOW DOWN.  If you change your methods, you’ll get different results.  This is no different than changing you diet, to change your body shape.

Last, your idea about moving outside the city may have some merit. You’re a Sagittarius with a 9th house moon.  The open space would probably suit you and things do move slower in the country.   Just be sure you don’t take your problems with you.  Move because you want sweeping change in your life (positive, upbeat), as opposed to moving because you believe something is wrong with you.

Have a question about astrology or life? Ask here! Please mention your location. It adds a layer of interest.